Is the kind of life you are currently living sustainable? 

In her book More Time to Think, Nancy Kline refers to an article which posed that question. It said:

“Describe your current life – the number of hours you sleep each night; the amount of time you rush; the proportion of your day you worry; the amount of time you don’t just sit; the amount of time you don’t listen to your children and your partner; the amount of time people don’t listen to you; the amount of time you complain; the amount of self-betrayal you do by not sticking to your value of self-care the amount of time you do emails; the amount of time you don’t exercise; the number of days per month you drink alcohol; how often you don’t laugh; how frequently you don’t each freshly prepared food; your waist measurement; your weight; the amount of time you spend in aeroplanes and cars; the amount of time you are away from the people you love most.”

And then she says, here was the scary question.

“Is this sustainable?


Is it?


Remember – life isn’t a dress rehearsal, so dare to be happier! x

T: @DareToBeHappier.

How busy are you, again?

Most of us judge how busy we are by how much we have to do. When there are too many things to do, we think we’re busy, and when there isn’t much to do, it feels like we’re not busy at all.
But in fact, we can feel busy when there isn’t that much to do, and we can feel relaxed even when there’s a lot going on. The states of “busy” and “not busy” aren’t defined by how many things there are to do. Contrary to popular opinion, there is no such thing as multitasking; the brain can tend to only one thing at a time.
Being too busy or not being busy is an interpretation of our activity. Busy-ness is a state of mind, not a fact. No matter how much or how little we’re doing, we’re always just doing what we’re doing, simply living this one moment of our lives. –

Norman Fischer

If I stopped

What would happen to your life if you slowed down for a minute, a day….a year?

If I stopped for a year
to read the classics
what would happen to my life?
If I stopped for a year
to visit art galleries or museums
would I ever work again?
If I stopped for a year
to dance and climb mountains
would the boardroom bell not sound for me?
if I stopped for a year to teach
would I learn who I was in the angry
eyes of our tender youth?
If I stopped for a year
could I feel the seasons change
and hear the ants talk?
If I stopped for a year
would I learn to breathe
and love the senses I have
long since forgotten?
If I stopped for a year
could I remember the birth canal
and the bright, white light called life?
If I stopped….

Sean Casey Leclaire


Time Management – Top Tip

I’m an excellent time manager. I’m lucky as it seems to come naturally to me, though I’ve learned lots of tools & techniques over the years. Perhaps all that time juggling life with looking after four children who were aged five and under was really the best “school” I ever went to!

One of my friends thinks I have a Time Tardis, and another thinks I have 48 hours in my day. I have neither, of course, and I’ve written previously that these comments do not necessarily mean what I’m doing is right. Or even good for me or others around me. Having lived a life juggling so many things and wearing so many hats, this year is an adventure in slowing time down, doing less and learning to just BE.

But I thought I’d share my top time management tip with you, one I’m learning myself this year. It’s powerful and you have no idea how much time, energy and effort you will save. And here it is.

Other people’s business is none of my business.


When the chips are down

Even for those who are naturally positive, there are times when choosing to be happy may be a deliberate action, repeated moment by moment, hour by hour and day by day.  Some days – when life is going well – it’s easy to choose happiness; only a fool isn’t happy when life is good.  But life happens – and so does death, disappointment, sorrow, disaster and darkness.  When you’re actually living through dark times, can you choose to be happier?

Some people might say that choosing to be happier simply means you are not dealing with life.  Instead, you are probably finding ways to avoid pain, ignore feelings and you are actually living life in an altered state that is “other than real life?” 

But what if you fundamentally believe that you can choose your happiness – and you teach others this?  When the chips are down, will this belief sustain you?  Today’s post is a guest post from Mary McPherson, director of The Relaxation Company in Perth, Scotland.  I first heard Mary speak in 2006 at a business exhibtion in the SECC in Glasgow in what happened to be my own annus horribilis. I was in a job I hated that conflicted with all my values, I felt stuck because of what was going on in my husband’s business at the time; I was stressed, depressed -and had got to a stage where I could see no options.  

In the job I was in, for the first time I was stuck in how to deal with colleagues, managers and those I managed.  I researched a number of courses and finally settled on an NLP Practitioner course – and thus began my love affair with the power of the mind.  It would take a year or so for this course and the rest of my reading (and thinking and journaling) to make a difference; but it’s the difference that has made the difference since. 

Turning myself around in the year that was my annus horribilis meant 2006 was a launching pad for my subsequent research on happiness and the power of the mind, so I’m grateful for it.  Mary’s story resonated with me at the time and since that, we’ve become friends – and I’ve seen how a similar belief makes all the difference to her, and those she now works with through The Relaxation Company. 

2011 has been a year of mixed blessings for her – the birth of another grandchild and the growth of her company combined with illness and loss.  Mary teaches many things, and is at the leading edge of some programmes aimed at supporting our teachers.  She is also someone who feels deeply so this blog is coming from someone who is living in the real world and not from someone who has a mask plastered on their face or who glosses over things to avoid feelings.  Her loss is real – but so is her response to that here.  Mary says:

After an interesting couple of months with various personal issues I have had a real opportunity to test the years of training in Awareness! There have been many difficult moments as I try to navigate my way through unfamiliar territory, but there have also been as many if not more remarkable and beautiful times too. As many of you know Jim had a heart attack early in June – completely out of the blue – from which he is making a good recovery after exceptionally good service from the NHS. My daughter had a beautiful baby boy called Cameron 4 days later and I arrived in Canada to be with them the following day. The joy and the sorrow are most definitely two sides of the same coin when one has to leave after just beginning to get to know this new little soul!
I returned with jet lag as not experienced before and then my dear Dad suffered a massive stroke and died on 11th July – and again the pain and joy were taken to a new level. However many of you have been so supportive of me and my family over these last few months – cards, messages, emails and many hugs have made a huge difference for which I want to say Thank You! Over and above I would also say that some of the tools that I have found most useful out of my toolkit have been Kum Nye, meditation, the podcasts from Sounds True – in particular Bruce Lipton which can be listened to at: I played a little of this at our Associates meeting this month to give everyone a flavour of the wisdom imparted in these free podcasts. A few people at the meeting weren’t sure how to download podcasts, so if this is the case, let me know and I will advise.

It is also worth mentioning that the tools which I have learned during the Champion for Wellbeing programme have had a massive influence on my behaviour through these difficult times. As we all know, it is often the seemingly little things which can fire us up, taking us by surprise and causing us the most stress! I’m not for one minute say that I have it all sorted, but my physical guide when stress levels are high is the old back pain pattern and I am delighted to say that this bit seems to be okay!! You may have noticed that we have another Open programme beginning in September – I can only recommend it and if you know anyone who may benefit from being better equipped for life, please let them know.

With all good wishes,